When Anxiety Hits

Im lying here wide awake at 2am watching the minutes tick by thinking about everything which could possiably go wrong in my new job. Thinking of all the reasons I shouldn’t do it. I’m driving myself around the bend, getting all worked up and unreasonable about nothing. Why is it at night time your brain goes into over drive about eveything. I’m lying here awake while my partner is snoring….why am I not asleep. Why do I have this incredible ablity to freak out about everything. 

Its my anxiety. I’m fine doing anything and I will do anything it’s just before hand I freak out and get really anxious. For me this happens for the most simple things in life. Like I get anxious crossing a road…’is the light still red, is that car going to stop, walk faster, move out of my way’ It’s just continuous. I am able to work through this and complete the task which I need to which I’m very greatful to be able to do. But my mind is forever second gussing me which is exhuating and frusting. I am forever feeling like I’m getting nowhere and in all fairness, I’m not. My days off are spent on the sofa watching nexflix so I can try to relax, when they should be spent preparing or volunteering to become a teacher. I get so anxious that I become stressed and then I become forgetful and forget what I’m meant to be doing and start worry about eveything eles. It’s exhausting and I’m exhausted. 

I honestly just wish I would switch my brain off. Sometimes I feel so good about how far I have come, how good I feel. I practice mindfullness, I do yoga, I give out postive vibes, I’ve got my crystals and my books to help. And some day I just want to give up, I feel shit. I don’t want to get out of bed, I don’t want to shower or talk to anyone. I feel like eveything I have done has been the wrong thing and I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulder and when I feel like this I feel guilty. I feel gulity becuase I do have a good life, I have friends family and a partner which loves me, I have my own place, I have a job. And I know there are people worse off than me. So I then get stressed about feeling down becuase I should be more greatful and then I get upset and cry and then my day off is ruin and I’ve officially achieved nothing. 

I know I’m not alone in feeling like this. I just felt like I needed to write down how I felt before I exploited. So sorry if this has been a long rambling blog which doesn’t make sense, I just needed to let it out. I know in reality eveything will be and is okay, just right now I don’t feel okay. But that’s okay. I’m going to work on that and be kind to myself and do whats best for me. 

Adele’s Word

XOXO

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‘Do what makes you Happy’

‘Do what makes you Happy’. We hear this a lot these days, especially when scrolling through inspirational quotes on Pinterest. Yes it’s 100% true we should do what makes us happy, why should we do anything which makes us unhappy? However is it always possible to do something which makes us happy all the time? Is it okay just to have a job because we need a job? Should we work in a job which is mediocre because we need the money, even if it doesn’t make us ‘happy’? Holding out hope that one day we will have a job which we love?

Work is such an important thing, yes we do it for the money but we also spent nearly every day of our lives at works, it influences our lives as much as anything else so surely having a job which makes you happy is nearly as important as having a relationship which makes you happy?

However the problem is it’s easier enough to say change your job, do something which makes you happy. But a lot of people don’t know what job or career would make them happy or they could move to their ‘dream job’ and actually hate it more than their current job. Or maybe you can’t get the job you want because your not yet qualified to do your dream job.

When this happens it can all start to feel very suffocating. You want to change but you feel trapped. Trapped in a job which you go to nearly every day can start to make you feel very down, make you feel like not showing up to work even though you need the money.

So how do we get out of this rut? We can’t just up and quit…even though I’m sure this thought has gone through some of our heads.

We make a plan.

We get proactive.

We don’t give up.

We keep hope for the future and for our dream job, because I truly believe that if you look forward to the future, the potential of a better job, it will make the time go quicker. It will make it seem like we are working towards something and not just going towards nothing.

So if any of you are stuck in a job because you can’t afford to not work, or change or relocate or you just don’t know what you want to do then don’t give up hope. Have hope that one day you will ‘ do something which makes you happy’. If you want it enough and you work for it and it will happen.

We will get there, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not even next year but if you keep working towards it, you will get there. Or who knows one day you might even fall in love with the job you already have.

For know lets do more of what makes us happy. Spend more time being happy outside of work then you do being miserable in work.

Good luck for the future and hold on to hope.

Adele’s word

XOXO

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Seeing Through the Fog

Have you ever experienced brain fog? Where your mind, thoughts, just everything seems foggy and distant. The moment where you’re sat with your friends yet you don’t really feel like your there. As if your looking through a fog. You know you’re there yet you don’t feel like you are, you can’t engage with them like you normally would. Everything just feels strange and not quite right.

For the past few days I have had brain fog. I’ve felt so distracted from things which are right in front of me, I haven’t been able to concentrate on anything. I’ve been feeling a bit down and sad, and normally I know how to make myself feel better yet at the moment I just can’t do it. I know what I need to do but I just can’t do it. It’s such a strange feeling, like I don’t have enough energy to do it.

The same thing has been happening with my life in general. I’ve been feeling suck and I know what I need to do to get myself out of this but I just can’t do it, I don’t feel up to it. I just sit there staring into this distance. I feel like I can’t do anything even though I know I can. I’m lost in the fog of my mind.

I would now normally write about how to overcome this feeling/problem or what I do to make myself better but today I’m not going to do that as I’m still in my fog. However I thought I would still share this experience with you, as other people might be going through the same thing and if you are, you are not alone.

If you guys have any tips of how you get out of your brain fog, let me know in the comments and I’ll be sure to try it.

Thanks for reading.

Adele’s Word

XOXO

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Me Time

Me time is so important. Spending time by yourself can be really beneficial, you can truly unwind, relax and sort through your thoughts. The other day I told my friend I was going for coffee, she replied ‘What, by yourself?’ I replied saying ‘Yeah, why?’ She told me how she wouldn’t go for coffee by herself, she would get a takeaway, but she wouldn’t sit in a coffee shop alone. This got me thinking, why do some people find it strange to spend time by themselves? While I was sat in the coffee shop with my vanilla latte I looked around there were lots of people by themselves reading and relaxing, they all looked content.

Recently I’ve begun to understand the importance of me time. Time to stop, think, relax and being able to enjoy your own company. We all need me time, I know sometimes its hard to find the time we all have busy lives but even if its just 5 minutes its so important. Its so good for us all to be by ourselves and more importantly to be happy by ourselves. It doesn’t matter if your single, in a relationship, married etc, we all need me time, just to stop. Sometimes we can be running around so quickly and doing so much for other people that we lose touch of ourselves and all of a sudden being alone can seem scary.

For all of us, sometimes, being alone is scary. Especially if your going through a hard time, having all those thoughts running through your head can just seem to much. But if your distracting yourself all the time because you don’t want to think about theses things it doesn’t make them go away, it just means your putting it off. We need to deal with theses thoughts even if it’s just a little at a time, it is better for you in the long run. Sometimes distracting yourself is good, you just want to forget which is totally fine. But you don’t want theses thoughts to effect your future either.

This is why ‘Me Time’ is so important. Being home, having a bath, relaxing, being in a safe place thinking through your thoughts, does you good in the long run. Try not to overthink, so you worry yourself, get a balance where you work through your thoughts in a beneficial way. Even just clearing your mind of all thoughts can be just as good. If this still seems to hard then just be by yourself but do an activity like going for a walk, listening to music, yoga, reading ect. It’ just important for us to be able to spend time with ourselves and this not to seem odd or strange. Obviously having coffee with your friends is better then by yourself but sometimes its nice doing these things by yourself. Just don’t be afraid to be on your own. The more you do it, the better it is. Your thoughts don’t seem so scary and it’s nice being able to go at your own pace.

This is what I’ve found anyway, we are all different, but for me I found that having me time has helped me overcome some hard times and I feel like I now really know myself, I know what I’m thinking and feeling. I feel happier with myself, both mentally and physically.

Leave me a comment and let me know how you spend your ‘Me Time’ and enjoy it.

Adele’s Word

XOXO 81dc933ff6a257c11e0e321922325ef5

Spring has Sprung

Forget the whole ‘new year, new you’ thing. Today is the first day of spring, this is the time for change. Spring is a time of new birth and flowers appearing from the dirt. Lets take this tip from nature and know that we must go through the dirt and darkness to see the light and the happier times which followers and that time is now. This spring holds new opportunities for us all. I personally love this time of the year, everything seems so fresh and new, we can all make a new start. So, if your like me and the new year wasn’t quite as great as everyone makes out, then join me in making the most of spring. Let the sunny morning inspire you and the long evenings encourage you.

I believe this spring is going to be great for us all. I’m going to stay positive and bloom! I have lots to look forward to; I’m starting a new job, I have plans for weekends away and lots of other exciting things. I hope this spring brings around good things for you too. Lets start this spring of by springing into action.I’m feeling motivated and ready to take on the world. Join me and invite spring to help break from the darkness of winter and let’s start to blossom together.

Spring has sprung!

Adele’s Word

XOXO

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Humble and Kind

Humble and Kind. These words are so important, especially in the world which we live. Staying grounded seems harder than ever, with everyone posting on social media about their ‘perfect’ lives, we can get carried away with our own importance. Staying humble means knowing your own worth but also knowing that its no greater than anyone else. To realize the good things which you have in your life and to be thankful, but not to think that this makes you better than anyone. I like to think that we all do our best to stay humble and kind, even when life is hard on us. That is why I have decide to write this blog post about my experience on staying humble and kind when times are hard.

In the last couple of months, well years really, life has dealt me a pretty shitty hand. I have dealt with so much shit it just seems unfair sometimes. I get to that stage where I just want to scream. I would think, this just isn’t fair why is this happening to me? We all have theses moments in our lives, our emotions get the best of us and we crack, rightly so in may cases, sometimes we need to just let it out and be angry at the world. But this state of mind in the long haul isn’t going to help us get through these hard times. What has always helped me is thinking how lucky I am, trying to keep perspective on the situation. We are all blessed in one way or another. Sometimes it’s hard to see but we are, we are here for a start. For me I have a family who care about me, great friends, a roof over my head and food on the table. I am lucky. Some people don’t have this. Someone is always worse of then us.

I lost my dad 2 years ago, when I was 21. This was obviously one of the hardest times of my life. But what got me through it was knowing I was lucky enough to have 21 years with him. There are so many people who don’t even get this. I am lucky that I had my dad for 21 years and that I had someones who is so hard to say goodbye to. I am lucky. At the time obviously this was hard to see but I always told myself that someone has it worse then me, I had a dad who loved me more than the world and I have 21 years of memories with him. I found this the best way to look at the situation. Yes it was a shit situation and I wouldn’t wish it upon anyone, but I was still lucky. I still had things to be thankful for.

I think it’s so important to realize how lucky we are and focus on this, even when we feel like we have lost everything and life is just utter shit there is good somewhere. If you look hard enough there is something to be grateful for and and there is someone worse off than you and they still have a smile on their face. This is what has kept me grounded, knowing that life could always be worse and others do have it worse then me. We are all on a journey and sometimes that journey takes us through shitty places but if we stay positive, hold on to a little bit of hope and keep a clear perspective, that it could be worse. We will get through it. You can do it. Your journey will carry on, you will get out of this shitty place and you will get to a better place in the future. It’s through the hard times that we learn, about ourselves and the people who surround us. As much as I would never want to go though the bad times again, I am grateful to them, they have made be the person I am today. They have given me perspective of what is important in life and shown me who is truly there for me. Sometimes the bad has to happen so we can see the good.

Things will get better. They always do. But for now….

Stay humble and kind.

Adele’s Word

XOXO

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Finding your Purpose.

Recently I’ve been feeling lost. Unattached from everything. I’m not really sure why I’ve been feeling so lost. I’ve got great friends, family and boyfriend but maybe I was expecting more from life by now. When I was younger I think I thought I would have a house by now and my dream job, without realizing the concept of money and how hard it is to actually get any job, let alone your dream job. I don’t always feel lost, when I’m with my friends I don’t feel lost but maybe this is just because I’m distracted. When I’m at home thinking I become lost. Lost in my own thoughts. Lost in life.

This evening I realized why I feel so lost. I feel lost because I’ve lost sight of my Purpose. I don’t feel like I have a purpose. Of course this isn’t true, we all have a purpose, but I’ve lost sight of mine. I think this would make anyone feel lost. Maybe I identified with my job as being my purpose or going back to university to do my master, but now I don’t have either of these to focus on, I’m left feeling purposeless. No-one should feel like this. We all have purpose. So lets stop and take time to think, what is our purpose?

What are you passionate about? What makes you feel alive, what gets you excited, gets your heart beating, what do you love doing? Maybe its; Make-up, Fashion, Working with children, Reading, People, Caring, meditation, music? It can be anything. For me its helping people, I love knowing I’ve had an impact in someones life and knowing that I have hopefully made their life a little bit better.

So, if we can identify our passion then we can identity our purpose. What we are passionate about is our purpose! It might not seem obvious right now, but if we follow our passions then slowly we will see we are living our lives with purpose. This could mean posting a blog post, going to work, applying for a new job, playing your guitar, becoming a mother. It could be anything. If you do what you love and follow your passion then your life has a purpose. It doesn’t have to be your job, it can be a hobby, it can really be anything. Everyday we need to realize our purpose and get out of bed wanting to carry it out, doing it for ourselves. Don’t lose touch of your passion, as I’ve just experience if you lose touch of your passion than you lose touch of your purpose and that can make you feel very lost. Now I’ve reminded myself of my purpose, its down to me to live it out.

For some it might be harder to identity what your passion is. Just take some time to think in the day, think what makes you excited, what do you love doing? If you’re still having trouble ask you friends and family. You might have more than one passion, your passion and purpose might change over time, which is totally normal. Just remember that feeling of being passionate, that love of something, don’t let feeling go. Build your life around that feeling. As long as you know your purpose, your never feel truly lost.

Adele’s Word.

XOXO

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